The Conversation Continues

What has United Synagogue been doing in the last month since the opening of its Centennial Celebration: The Conversation of the Century?

We have been going through evaluations, developing a schedule of webinars that will feature speakers and resources from the conference, and, simultaneously, laying the groundwork for our next convention. We have been delighted by the calls and emails from hundreds of attendees with a single message: "Give us more!"

The feedback from our sessions tells us why. After many of the workshops during our conference, people filled out short questionnaires to note what they learned, what they'll do next, and what additional questions remain. The enthusiastic responses - including the one below that diagrams someone's understanding of Dr. Erica Brown's session on Change, Vision and the Growth Mindset - showed that workshops sparked not only ideas but also more questions.

In fact, out of 652 responses from 39 workshops, there were 540 answers to the question, "What is one 'next step' you're taking after this session?" What did people say? Most of the answers fell into two categories: "Bring back this idea to my shul," and "Continue the conversation with my board."

We all know, though, what can happen to a motivated person who comes back from a conference with a great idea. The reality of leadership, resistance to change, and, frankly, day-to-day business gets in the way of following through.

For that reason, here's what United Synagogue will be doing for the next few months. On a regular basis, we will provide you with information that focuses on a topic from one of our workshops. We'll have links to the presentation if they're available, resources related to the topic and a question or series of questions for group discussion. We want to share the ideas and resources from the Conversation of the Century in the bite-sized pieces that will help you, your board or your congregation create a shared understanding, vision, goals and action.

Cross posted on www.USCJ100.org

How to Find Good News Every Day

I look for good news stories every week because I need a break from the daily overdose of negative in the media. My favorite one-stop shopping for a smile, besides YouTube cat videos, is the Good News Network. Here's an uplifting story from Sunday's pages: A man sat next to a table with two women who had clearly heard bad news about a diagnosis. Seeing their distress, he asked the waiter to give him their bill. He paid his and theirs, and then quietly left. The waiter, who shared the note on Reddit, wrote, "Faith in humanity restored."

And here's another nice piece: Ethan Metzger performs his poem, My Parents Brainwashed Me, at the Bronx Youth Poetry Jam. Watch the whole thing, but here is something that stands out:

My parents did brainwash me... 

As early as I can remember, my parents were brainwashing me to have respect for other people, for their belongings and for myself...

Yeah, my father twisted my infant brain in such a horrific way that he made me value my integrity, and to make matters even worse, he led by example.

Kindness. Respect. Setting a positive example. The enduring values in these stories caught my attention this week. Last week, I got my good news in a different way - through United Synagogue's Centennial Solomon Schechter Awards.

The Solomon Schechter Awards have been the primary way that United Synagogue recognized excellence in programming in our synagogues for many years. Hundreds of synagogues would nominate the programs that they considered innovative or well received. This year, from 190 nominations, we gave eight major awards, and commendations for 40 programs that we hope will be replicated in other communities. Judges looked for more than creativity or events that had a positive response; they looked for impact in creating kehilla - sacred community. The programs receiving this year's Centennial Solomon Schechter Awards - from the deeply rooted focus in the Jewish Center of Princeton's religious school curriculum, The Story of My Family Coming to America, to Shaar Shalom Synagogue's Mitzvah Knitters - grew from a core vision to engage hearts, minds and souls.

We'll be sharing descriptions of all the award-winning programs, but I want to highlight the three that received special once-in-a-century "Chesed" acknowledgment. They were notable because they made an impact on the lives of people beyond their own communities. Here are the descriptions provided by the founders of each of these award-winning programs.




Living Tzedakah in Appalachia, from Congregation B'nai Israel, Millburn, NJ:

Congregation Bnai Israel (CBI) has established, over the past 4 years a presence in McRoberts, Kentucky, in the heart of  Appalachia. There are no Jews in McRoberts, only rural poor.  McRoberts is considered the poorest town in the poorest section of the United States. The goals of the ongoing program include:  1) To introduce the concepts of tikkun olam and tzedakah as responsibilities of our community to the entire world.  2) To educate our members as to the difference between rural and urban poor.  3) To brings hands on experience to our members in working with people outside our comfort zone.  4) To make a difference in the lives of poor people and families in McRoberts, Kentucky.

Weathering Superstorm Sandy as a Family, from Greenburgh Hebrew Center, Dobbs Ferry, NY:

In the Spring of 2012, we adopted a mission and vision statement that lists as one of our core values to "Be a family."  As Superstorm Sandy was approaching, during the storm, and in its aftermath, we applied that core value by actively engaging and caring for the members of our synagogue community as well as the greater community.  By doing so we helped build a sacred community among the members of our kehilla on many levels, including that people had the opportunity to perform mitzvot for one another; our shul became more clearly not just a building but a home, a place of safety and comfort; our Rabbi provided spiritual leadership; and all worked together to collect tzedakah for people in the greater community who were less fortunate than we were.

The Altamont Bakery, from Congregation B'nai Emunah, Tulsa, OK:

The Altamont Bakery, a pro-social enterprise founded by Congregation B'nai Emunah, operates year-round in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Founded in the summer of 2011, it was designed to bring members of the congregation together with formerly homeless mentally ill citizens of our community in a shared, cooperative venture. The goal was to produce an outstanding product line while offering support, encouragement, and a sense of community to men and women who have been marginalized by circumstance.     A large team of Synagogue volunteers works without compensation in this project. A complimentary community dinner is served at the Synagogue on each baking day. A full description of the project is available at the bakery website: www.altamontbakery.com. The great gift of the program is a new insight into mental illness for everyone who volunteers for the project. Our bakers are troubled, uneasy souls who are also talented, generous, thoughtful people, capable of sustained effort and genuine achievement. We have entered into a deep and lasting relationship which feels less and less like a benefaction and more and more like a mutual relationship. The program has opened all of us to a new way of seeing, and to enlarging our sense of the human community where everyone, truly, is an image of the living God.

These programs might not be replicable in your community. They responded to extraordinary circumstances, like a hurricane, or required continual devotion to the vision of extending a helping hand to others. But the enduring values that were the foundation for these programs - kindness, respect, setting a good example - are no different than those in the good news stories I look for every week. They're just practiced on a communal level intentionally, every day, in a sacred community.

We Became A Kehilla In About 5 Minutes

Last Friday afternoon, 200 people walked seven blocks in the pouring rain rather than wait with 300 others for buses that were stuck in Baltimore rush hour traffic. Fifty gave up the wait, avoided the walk and hailed cabs. When they got to the hotel where Shabbat dinner and Friday night services were to begin, the prayerbooks, which were shipped on the buses, were still being hauled upstairs.

The music in four of the five services carried through the thin walls. The choir accompanying Cantor David Propis had to hold their beat against the drums in the Mishkan Chicago service next door. The hallway outside was lined with people in costumes ringing cowbells and banging drums. As we welcomed the Sabbath, they welcomed runners who were competing the next day to raise funds for breast cancer research.

Rabbi Felipe Goodman, of Temple Beth Sholom in Las Vegas, put the cacophony into perspective. "When you go to the Kotel in Jerusalem," he said, "you hear the voices and music of thousands of Jews praying in their own style. We're getting a little bit of that here tonight."

As we settled in, and five different versions of Lecha Dodi floated through the hallways, we were a community that forgot the rain and the rushing. We moved into sacred time and space, and remembered why we came there in the first place - to find each other.

This is why Marty Stein, from Temple Beth El in Aliso Viejo, CA, said, "We became a kehilla in about five minutes."



Over the next four days, 1,200 Conservative Jews would find each other. They would learn with some of the best teachers and thinkers in the Jewish world. Two poets in residence, Andrew Lustig and Vanessa Hidary, would inspire and challenge them with spoken word performances about Jewish identity. 150 USY teens and college students would remind the older adults that there is, in fact, a new generation hungry for the friendship, joy, and exploration that Conservative Judaism allows them. 1,000 clergy and synagogue leaders would see that they are not alone. They would share ideas and ignite relationships that they'll follow up on. United Synagogue would announce new projects, including a cost containment program, health insurance for synagogue professionals, the launch of the continent-wide PJ Library program, and a new teen engagement initiative thanks to the generous gift from the Susser Family Trust.

As for me, I would meet 500 new people each day, and stay up much too late in the Sulam Suite with synagogue presidents, educators, and young musicians and artists. I bit my nails through presentations that ran overtime, re-wrote speeches up to the moment when presenters took the stage, moved chairs, directed traffic, and walked 20 miles a day without ever leaving the building. I have never been more proud or grateful to work with my dedicated, talented colleagues, and our generous volunteers and supporters.

In every session during the conference, we asked people to write what their next steps will be when they get home. Here is a small sampling:

• Focus on builders, not buildings.

• Evaluate how we address people in transition.

• Read more about process theology. I am a committed Conservative Jew, but my theology is still a work in progress. 

• Observe areas where my shul innovates and where there is resistance to change.

• Find ways to help our parents have a “moment” of in-shul spirituality.

• Find a “champion” to start the conversation about reaching out to 20’s and 30’s

• Join “God’s Timeline” and will look into setting up a congregational timeline.

• Speak with my rabbi about his approach to same sex marriage and synagogue wedding ceremonies.

• Taking back to my synagogue a “lens” to see how we might be unintentionally discriminating against those who don’t meet the norm.

• Bring board members into the school wing.

News articles are still being written, and people are still discussing what this gathering meant. Our team is back to work sending out thank you notes, getting the videos of our speakers onto our website, and bundling the resources from nearly 50 workshops together by topic to share with our United Synagogue network. We're debriefing to remember what worked, and fix what went wrong as we begin to plan the next convention in two years.

How would you follow up on the Conversation of the Century?

Break A Leg

I used to volunteer to be assistant director for our synagogue's biannual musical. Having minored in theatre in college, I knew the three priorities for the position: 1) Take copious notes during rehearsals to ensure that decisions one day turn into actions by the next. 2) Get the cast and crew what they need to work together seamlessly. 3) Keep people's spirits up.

A synagogue play is supposed to be a community-building experience. But one year, everyone was miserable. For many reasons, this particular production brought out in 50 adults their worst high school drama behavior, from prima donna tantrums and behind-the-back whispering to sneaking out for a sip of scotch. Ticket sales were slow, no one wanted to rehearse, and the group's motivation was lower than a prison chain gang. The director and producer and I were chronically depressed. 

To cheer up my two beleaguered friends, I wrote an email with the subject line, "How to Produce a Synagogue Play." I gave ten tips that included things like, "Remove dialogue and choral numbers and replace with solos," and "Give 40 performances so every cast member gets the lead at least once." The insider jokes lifted our spirits, I assumed no one else would see it, and we got to opening night.

To my horror, the director had put my email in the printed program! She thought it was lighthearted and funny, and made a great final page. I was overcome with dread, waiting for cast members to take it personally and confront me for humiliating them publicly. I made plans for the next congregation I would join after I was ejected from this one. But no one said anything. They had felt the same way, and understood the good-natured humor.

Move forward 20 years. I am one of the lead professionals producing United Synagogue's Centennial Celebration. My role has felt like being the assistant director of the biggest, most complicated synagogue play ever attempted. It has been exciting, terrifying, and fun. Our team learned how to work together, and after a year of nearly continual communication, we can almost read each other's minds. I can honestly report that I never felt the need to write a tongue-in-cheek email to boost morale, although there was one time when I nearly crafted a fake press release that changed the date of the founding of United Synagogue so we'd have an extra year to plan.

The program guide has already gone to print, but in my own tradition of "how-to" commentary, I now offer my advice on....

HOW TO PRODUCE A SUCCESSFUL EVENT

Tip #1. Celebrate a 100-year anniversary. Really, it makes choosing a theme a breeze. 

Tip #2. Set realistic goals. It will help you make complicated decisions about your space needs. The risk is that if you surpass your expectations, you might have to walk 600 people from your hotel to another one seven blocks away for Friday night dinner and religious services. (The same risk applies to goals for the number of exhibitors. If you're not careful, you will have to convince them that the rafters outside the restrooms are prime space.) 

Tip #3. Boost attendance by holding your event during a secular four-day holiday weekend like Columbus Day. The risk is that the city will host a marathon at the same time. But, you'll enjoy the hunt as you help people search for rooms when your hotel runs out of them. 

Tip #4. If you encourage people to present workshops, be prepared for an enthusiastic response from the community. Then refer to the risks in Tip #2 about space. 

Tip #5. Don't be afraid to assign staff members to the core steering committee who are already too busy to work on one more thing. Look at it like baseball players warming up for their next at bat by swinging two or three times the weight of a regular bat. Those professionals will appreciate how light their regular work load feels when the event is over! 

Tip #6. One month out from the event, turn over 1,000 details that the core team set in motion to about 40 additional staff and volunteers. They'll thank you, too, for the reason detailed in tip #5. 

Tip #7. Look for chair people who are serial synagogue presidents. They are human beings with a strange genetic inability to run away from responsibility, weekly meetings, mind-numbing trivial detail, whining, conflict, political intrigue and constant pressure to raise or save money. 

Tip #8.  Engage an event planner. It's worth every penny to be able to say, "Our event planner is responsible for that." 

Tip #9.  Identify target audiences and ask "connectors" to keep reaching out to them. Avoid counting how many people have registered. Instead, look for who is not registered...yet. In the end, it will make your CEO extremely happy that your assurance, "Everything is going as planned," turns out to be true. Remind him/her of how right you were when it's time for your annual performance review.  

Tip #10. About your family: Remember that they won't understand the new words you'll throw around, like, "room blocks," "exposure," "values engineering," "MOS interviews," and "VOG (voice of God)." Tape a photo of yourself to your refrigerator so they'll remember what you look like if you spend more time in your office than your kitchen for a year. Thank them profusely for their patience with your continual distraction. Maybe even post your thanks publicly on your blog.

With more than 1,000 participants, the Conversation of the Century will take center stage in the Conservative Jewish community when it "opens" on Friday. To the hundreds of performers, speakers, volunteers, and staff who will bring it to life, I say thank you, and, as they say in the theatre, "Break a leg!"

What Synagogues Can Learn From "Breaking Bad"

What will you be doing tonight at 9:00? If you're like me and 6 million other people, you'll be watching the final episode of Breaking Bad. And if you're like me and 4.8 million other people, you didn't watch the first season when it began; maybe not the second or third, either. You caught up later during a few weeks of "binge watching."

As the New York Times noted yesterday, Breaking Bad's audience grew over time because of word of mouth and its availability through Netflix:

"Breaking Bad" made its debut in 2008 to an underwhelming 1.2 million viewers - which would have caused many programming chiefs to drop it. But the show dodged cancellation and slowly built a following - especially once the old episodes were made available en masse on Netflix. 

Just using my own tv viewing habits as an example, similar cases can be made for The Wire, Boardwalk Empire, Rome, Downton Abbey, House of Cards, The Newsroom, Copper, and DaVinci's Demons. You can make your own list, or take this advice from Newsday if you haven't started this new habit.

It's a habit that is here to stay. Advice about what's good to watch comes from people who we view as reliable sources - our friends, family, coworkers, hair stylists - anybody, really, but the networks themselves. Amazon started us on the habit when they published reviews of books by readers, and then told us what other readers like us were also reading. We now buy music, clothing, shoes and housewares, eat in restaurants and stay in hotels AFTER we check the ratings from other people. Our computers and smart devices allow us to find what we want when we're ready.

I think this habit has implications in our kehillot, (communities). Clergy and lay leaders have tried for years to entice members to come into their synagogue buildings with programming. Volunteers have been burned out, budgets have been blown, new ideas have come and gone. Synagogue leaders complain of low engagement in programs, and yet continue to look for new ideas for programs. In part, it's because they ask their members what will get them more involved, and the answer they often get is, "New programs." Or, "More programs."

For this reason, I am watching data coming in from members of the 10 kehillot in United Syagogue's new Sulam for Strategic Planners program. Strategic planning teams are using our template and collection mechanism for congregational surveys to guide their planning.

We will share a summary of the aggregate data once participating synagogues have reviewed it, but here are the results from one question that has to do with programming.

Out of nearly 2,000 respondents, 593 people filled in the blank for the following question:

If our congregation would offer _____, I would attend and ask a friend to join me. 

A text analysis showed that the most frequently used words in their essay answers were adult, Jewish, social, Hebrew, services, programs, night, and classes. The most frequent phrases were Friday night, adult education, education programs, cooking classes, learning opportunities, Hebrew classes, social programs and more family.

There is nothing new in those answers.

I mentioned in a previous post that I look for the story where data points, rather than at the data itself, so I searched for other patterns. Hidden in the phrases of all of the respondents were feelings, not program ideas. Words like inspiring, ruach, exciting, convenient, illuminating, interesting, spiritual, enlightening, meaningful, dynamic, powerful, uplifting.

So, what can Breaking Bad teach synagogues? Its breathless fan base illustrates what is behind building an audience today. Think back to when you first heard the premise of the show: A high school science teacher dying of cancer decides to make money by getting into the methamphetamine business. If you ignored it, or found it a little repulsive, so did I...until my cool friends, and my most upright, straight-laced family members, told me I would feel like I got on a roller coaster and wouldn't want to get off. They didn't tell me what the story was about; they told me how I would feel. Against my own quantitative data about my preferences, (the amount of historical fiction listed in paragraph three of this post is no coincidence), I followed their advice. One Breaking Bad episode, and I was hooked faster than a...well, you fill in the blank with the clever meth addict metaphor.

People respond to word of mouth testimonials when they're about feelings, not content.

Advice to kehilla leaders: Planning any new successful program or initiative will require paying less attention to what the program planner thinks is good content, and more to how the program will transform people. It begins with assuring that new ideas are based on values, mission, and impact. If participation isn't a home run at first, before declaring it a failure, check to see if you have a few raving fans. Then help them bring in others. Synagogues might not have Netflix or On Demand where people can catch up or get on board, but we have You Tube, live streaming, Facebook, polls, newsletters, listserves, personal conversations, tutoring, Shabbat dinner, and services every week (or every day!). Find ways for a small community to build a larger community.

This week, we will publicly announce the recipients of the Centennial Solomon Schechter Awards. We'll honor the winning kehillot on Monday, October 14, at our Centennial Celebration. Their programs are excellent examples of planning that began with a holistic vision of transforming hearts and minds. Some were an instant success; others built their audience and impact over time. The best of the programs adapted and changed according to what they learned from the community. Watch for the announcement and descriptions as we highlight them on our website, in webinars, and at conferences throughout the year.

In the meantime, you'll find me at 9:00 tonight with my popcorn and beer in front of my tv. Because I'm a multi-tasking nerd who loves to find community among strangers, I'll also be enjoying the interactive surveys and quizzes on the Breaking Bad StorySync on my laptop.

And I'm open to suggestions for the next tv series to add to my binge watching queue.

What Has Changed in 100 Years?

The year: 1914.

From The American Hebrew newspaper, commenting on the second annual meeting of the new organization, The United Synagogue of America:

The United Synagogue is still in an embryonic state. This was proved by the many reports rendered during the all day session. The first year of activity showed no practical results, for no real work of any kind was indulged in. It was a twelve month period of experimentation. Each committee (there were six) conducted several investigations and at the meeting the chairman spoke of these investigations. Furthermore, each committee suggested plans of active work to be engaged in by the newly-appointed committee during the coming year.

I found this quote within a document, A History of The United Synagogue of America 1913-1963, written by Abraham J. Karp on the occasion of the 50th anniversary of United Synagogue. It's a commemorative piece, intended to show the growth of the organization. Knowing what I do about startups and organizational change, I'm not surprised that the second year progress report on the founding of United Synagogue seemed like an account of maddening committee wheel-spinning. As the founder of United Synagogue, Solomon Schechter's idea of a "big tent," according to Michael Cohen, meant balancing "inclusivity with boundaries." Where do you put the pegs of that tent? Some would argue that we're still working on it.

In addition to the history lesson, I'm fascinated by the challenges traced by Karp in the first 50 years of United Synagogue's history. Here are some examples:

1914: There were 24 congregations affiliated with United Synagogue. Their religious school students numbered 2385 boys and 2096 girls. At the United Synagogue annual meeting, Solomon Schechter commented on the report of the Education Committee, given by Rabbi Mordecai Kaplan:

The congregations have to maintain a double system of schooling in order to meet the wishes of the two classes of members that are usually to be found in every congregation, namely, those whose slogan is "more Judaism," and those who ask for "less Judaism."

 Excerpt from a Report on the 1922 Convention, by H.B. Bernstein:

...One would gather from what was said that unless we begin immediately to interpret our sacred literature in the light of modern thought we shall not be able to hold our college students against the free sciences they learn. This statement was repeated so often as to give the impression that there was no critical work being done today. This was not the case, was the reply.

 The Herald of the United Synagogue Recorder, May 1, 1925:

In addition, several new important activities are being inaugurated...Of considerable value is the Teachers' Registry which has been established. The hundreds of communities, large and small, that need teachers or principals, are finding their task made much easier through this Teachers' Registry.

The keynote of the Sixteenth Annual Convention held in Chicago in April, 1928, was "Reunite Synagogue and Life," and President S. Herbert Golden talked about lay leaders:

Our laity should be so brought up as to be ever prepared when the call of service comes to answer "hineni." By drafting the baale batim into the administrative tasks of the organization, we can leave the rabbis free to devote themselves to the religious and educational phases of our program. 

The biennial convention in Chicago from May 13-17, 1948, according to Karp, focused on Palestine, Europe and America.

On May 15th, the very day when the State of Israel was proclaimed, the session was devoted to "The Jewish State-Promise and Challenge."

And the theme of the 1953 convention was "Building Synagogue Leadership."

A National Survey On Leadership disclosed a vast gap between the actual and desired. The sessions were devoted to the bridging of this gap.

Education, Youth and Young Adults, Membership, Volunteerism, Israel, Leadership. We're still tackling issues of kehilla - sacred community - described since the earliest days of the 20th Century, even though the dynamics of what we're addressing and how we're going about it have shifted.

The 21st Century updates to these challenges will take place at United Synagogue's 100th anniversary celebration, October 11-15, in Baltimore. There are about 130 sessions and workshops. Here are some of them. I'll leave it up to you to recognize how our focus and direction have changed since that second annual meeting in 1914. And to be part of the next century's conversation.

Education

• Rabbi Jim Rogozen, United Synagogue's chief learning officer, will convene, The Future of Congregational Education, with Jonathan Woocher, David Bryfman, and Nancy Parkes
• Congregational Education for the 21st Century: Religious School in the Clouds, led by Wendy Light and Dr. Richard Solomon
• Terry Kaye will lead, From Vision to Nitty Gritty: Putting Educational Technology into Practice 
• Ensuring the Jewish Future: The Case for Day Schools, with Dr. Elaine Cohen, Rabbi Moshe Schwartz, and Bill Zarch
• Maximizing the School as an Asset of the Congregation, with Sue Wyner

Youth, College Outreach and Young Adult Engagement

• A Memo from Your Future, with Rabbi Dave Levy, Michael Sacks, and USYers
• Making the "Next Generation" the "Now Generation," In Order to Ensure a "Future Generation," with Yossi Garr, Teri McGuire, Rabbi Ita Paskind, and Rabbi Joel Seltzer 
• From Campus to Kehilla: What Synagogues Can Learn from College Communities (And Vice Versa), led by Seffi Kogan
• 50 Shades of Growth: Engaging the Hearts and Souls of 20s & 30s, led by Rabbi Jeremy Fine and Rabbi Aaron Weininger

Membership

• Tefilla as a Vehicle for Engagement and Building Community, with Rabbi Lizzi Heydemann
• Inside Outside: Renewing Jewish Outreach, a panel discussion with Debbie Albert, Rabbi Daniel Burg, Rabbi Adam Greenwald, convened by Rabbi Michael Siegel
• Reaching Out to Interfaith Families, with Rabbis Elliot Cosgrove, Ed Feinstein, Deborah Wechsler, and Michael Siegel
• Technology and Engaging Families: It's not about getting them in the door anymore, with Jill Allenberg Stepak and aliza Sperling 
• Where is Your Place in Our Story? Storytelling as a Tool for Welcoming, with Jennifer Rudick Zunikoff
• Intermarriage and the Conservative Movement: Responding to the Challenge of Demographics, led by Rabbi Charles Simon and Steve Lachter

 Volunteerism and Leadership

• Volunteer Recognition: An Easy Resource Tool for Kehillot, led by Linda Sussman, USCJ kehilla relationship manager 
• V'Asu Li Mikdash: Build for Me a Sanctuary - Creating and Recreating the Kehilla of Today and Tomorrow, with Rabbi Hayim Herring and Rabbi Sid Schwartz, moderated by Rabbi Michael Siegel
• Creating an Effective Board, with Susan Kasper and Robert Leventhal
• Sacred Community and Fiscal Responsibility, with Fred Passman and Barry Mael

Israel

• Next Year in Jerusalem: Fact, Fiction, Fantasy or Farce? with Dr. David Breakstone, Rabbi Amy Eilberg, Yizhar Hess, Arie Katz, moderated by Rabbi Stuart Weinblatt
• 65 Years of Israeli Popular Music in 60 minutes, with Cantor David Lipp
• Why You're A Better Israel Educator Than You Think You Are, with Rabbi Josh Fiegelson and Aliza Goodman
• Maalot: Innovative Programs for Israel Education and Advocacy, with Rabbi Paul Freedman and Morey Schapira
• The Schizophrenic Zionist, with Dr. David Breakstone and Joel Chasnoff 

PJ Library Goes to USCJ

Leaders of 118 Conservative synagogues were notified yesterday that for the first time they will be able to bring the gift of Jewish books, available through PJ Library, to children in their communities. This unprecedented expansion of the PJ Library program is into areas where there are no other PJ Library "partners," like Jewish Federations or JCCs. These synagogues join 37 others that are able to access PJ Library resources through United Synagogue's partnership with the Harold Grinspoon Foundation. It will result in up to 30,000 new subscriptions over the next five years of the program.

Why does this matter?

PJ Library is one of the simplest and most elegant entry-point-into-Jewish-experience programs, in addition to Birthright, to emerge in our 21st Century community. Begun in 2005, PJ Library recently reached its one-millionth subscriber. A report on its impacts will be published soon, but at a February 2013 PJ Library partnership launch involving United Synagogue, Union for Reform Judaism and the Jewish Federation of South Palm Beach County, the good folks at PJ Library described some jaw dropping statistics. Between 40 and 80% of PJ Library subscriptions go to unaffiliated families, depending on the community.

PJ Library makes inroads because it's free. Grandparents sign up their grandchildren. Parents notice its "no strings attached" offer. But the best approach to any free gift has to include follow up and build relationships if the ultimate goal is to connect young families to the Jewish community. Synagogues are the natural entry point; they have the best chance of supporting Jewish identities and journeys over a lifetime. Many synagogue leaders ask how they can find and reach out to the unaffiliated. PJ Library seems to be a great answer.

The potential strength of this new program, and where we're testing new territory, is what happens in synagogues that commit to using this outreach tool. This is not a free gift to a synagogue; it's a matching grant. Although the cost per subscription is significantly low because of the underwriting by United Synagogue's donors and the Harold Grinspoon Foundation, each participating synagogue must commit to raise their share towards their subscription goals. Participating synagogues will get advice and help with securing donors in their synagogues. And we're offering resources for outreach and engagement, networking the professionals and volunteers who will work with PJ Library families in their kehillot. We're even providing strategic planning resources to align their work with the vision of their leadership. I believe that the synagogues that commit to offering PJ Library will strengthen their leadership, membership and infrastructure, in addition to giving Jewish books to young families in their communities.

Here's a video that gives a peek at what is being accomplished already in our pilot program with 33 synagogues in metropolitan New York.

Find out if your kehilla is eligible for the USCJ-sponsored PJ Library program by emailing our PJ Library Coordinator, Rabbi Cara Weinstein Rosenthal. If not, it means you're in an area where PJ Library is already available. But don't feel left out. We have created a special venue for families in your community to build relationships, and have a great Shabbat experience at our Ramah-USY Family Camp at the Centennial Celebration in Baltimore. Scholarships for PJ Library families are available. So find the PJ Library families in your kehilla, and let them know you can help them receive the gift of Shabbat.

And Two Hard Boiled Eggs

My event planner friend told me that a recurring dream that's common in her profession is perfectly captured by the Marx Brothers in the stateroom scene in "A Night at the Opera." Change the dream location to anywhere - a dorm room, classroom, living room, studio, restaurant, office - the dynamic is the same. It starts with a simple food order that gets add ons, people pour in, then chaos begins as it all comes together.

Which brings me to United Synagogue's Centennial Celebration, October 11-15, 2013, in Baltimore. 

I wrote last October about the vision for the Centennial. To mark the 100th anniversary of the founding of United Synagogue, the simple order was to create a gathering to honor our history and celebrate our future. More than a party, it would be a conversation: the Conversation of the Century. We planned for a series of conversation starters with notable speakers to jump start our thinking, followed by workshops led by experts who would help us dig in to the topics. We were pleasantly surprised when more than 100 experts answered our call for workshop proposals, and our challenge began to find time and space for all of the wonderful people who wanted their voices to be heard.

Our menu "add on" was Shabbat. Our plan was that Shabbat would set the stage for conversation. We would experience the best of Conservative Jewish worship, learning, music, contemplation and relaxation together. So five different services were planned, with surprise and variety that would demolish anyone's definition of a "typical" Conservative religious service. Learning and music would punctuate the weekend. We added a Ramah-USY Family camp, so that the Shabbat immersion experience could start as early as possible for young families. 100 USY teens would be there as the next generation of leaders of our Conservative Jewish kehillot. 

And two hard boiled eggs.

As of last week, we realized that with a month to go, and the local Baltimore/Washington registrations still coming in, we had outgrown our space at the Baltimore Marriott Waterfront on Friday night. Rather than risk what happens at the end of the Marx Brothers' scene, we had to explore our options. Should we break up into two groups, one at our hotel and another in a different space? Should we declare our Shabbaton sold out, collectively hold our breath, and squeeze in? Or find another space that can accommodate everyone and more?

It was not hard to come to a conclusion, based on our original vision of having as many people as possible come together on Shabbat for joyful worship, learning, and contemplation. Friday night at the Centennial needs to set the stage for our celebration and shared experience of the best of Conservative Judaism. So, our Friday night dinner and services will be moved to a bigger stateroom at a nearby space in the Inner Harbor of Baltimore, one where we can stay together in our dynamic, multi-generational, historical gathering.

Join us for this once-in-a-century experience. There's still room.

Running the Bases Towards Rosh Hashanah

Since coming to United Synagogue in 2010, each year has been like a strange baseball game for me where runners never leave the basepath once they get a hit. I run full speed into home, and instead of going to the dugout, I turn the corner and head straight for first base again. The High Holidays force me to finally get off the field and sit down.

Today as I head for the bench, I'm thinking back at how I rounded the bases in 2012-13:

• Traveled to Boston, Boca Raton, Birmingham, Baltimore, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Atlanta, and Toronto, meeting about 400 people I never knew before.
• Spent 156 hours on retreat with 55 new and incoming synagogue presidents.
• And about 10 days on retreat with 70 United Synagogue staff and volunteers.
• Met 50 times with the team of staff and volunteers who have planned United Synagogue's Centennial Celebration.
• Answered 1,000 questions. Make that 2,000. And a number of them were trick questions designed to be posted online somewhere to prove a point I wasn't making.
• Wrote fewer blog posts than I did the previous year, but more reports and proposals.
• Thought 2 million thoughts. A day. Usually about synagogues and the people in them.
• Took a real vacation for the first time in three years. 

Tonight, I'll take my seat in the dugout. I'll have 10 days to reflect on what difference it made that I traveled so much, answered so many questions, and thought so much about things related to work. Before I judge my efforts harshly, telling myself that I should have spent more time on something else like volunteer work, exercise or sleep, I'd like to count, with gratitude, the blessings that came from all that base running:

• The stories of many of the people I met were interesting. Some were inspiring and unforgettable, and changed how I view the purpose of life.
• I learned that some people who ask difficult questions are not asking trick questions. I can find out the difference if I engage them instead of avoid them.
• When I spoke my mind, I was heard. When I disagreed, I was given the benefit of the doubt. When I asked for help, I got it. 
• I laughed thousands of times. 
• When I finally came home, I had a family and friends who were happy to see me.

Whether your annual game is baseball, rugby or ping pong, I hope that Rosh Hashanah begins your time out - to find a quiet place on the bench to take a breath, a sip of wine, and a moment to reflect on how your particular sport has changed you from one year to the next.

L'shanah tovah u'metukah.

Kehilla Across the Generations

The early 20th Century American humorist, Frank "Kin" Hubbard, said about vacation: "If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on a vacation."

My vacation this month took another tack: If some people didn't tell me, I'd never know I had been away on a vacation. That's because my weeks were filled with activities that were very much like my work: nearly constant connection with people, a retreat, and a spiritually moving bar mitzvah experience in a most surprising place.

My two-week vacation revolved around a reunion of my husband's closely-knit Greek family, (picture a Sephardic "My Big Fat Greek Wedding"), on the occasion of the bar mitzvah of his nephew, Kevan. Kevan lives in Hawaii, and knew that few family members could go there this summer, especially his 98-year old grandfather and 90-something grandmother. Because Kevan is an amazing kid, (now picture a young man making a "hang loose" sign), he chose to have his bar mitzvah at Martin's Run Senior Living Community, in Broomall, PA, where his grandparents reside.

A bar mitzvah at a senior living community. It meant that weeks before the actual date, residents at Martins Run who I met during visits or out in the community told me about how excited they were for the weekend. "We're having a bar mitzvah!" they beamed, becoming the extended family for the event. For an entire weekend, the Elias family and the Martin's Run residents were a mashup, from sharing a communal Shabbat kiddush lunch, to Sunday swimming around the residents doing water exercises, and Elias grandchildren shooting pool and playing video games on the TV next to the residents' bridge group table.

Shabbat morning, though, crossed more than the generations in the facility; it linked the world-wide Jewish community across time. The Torah scroll from which Kevan read was Torah Number 586, a 130-year old scroll rescued from the Czech Republic town of Lipnik nad Becvou. Purchased and re-kashered by the Martin's Run Community, it was rededicated in April 2012.

The last bar mitzvah boy to read from Torah Number 586 was Irik Schreiber - in 1941 before the 100 Jews in the town were sent to concentration camps by the Nazis. Now in 2013, another boy, a surfer kid whose back yard is the Pacific Ocean and summer camp was in Japan, became bar mitzvah using the scroll.

I had a moment when I wondered what the Jews of Lipnik nad Becvou would think about the American community where their Torah came back to life. That morning, the rabbi and gabbai were women. The family of the bar mitzvah boy lives in Israel, the U.S., and Canada, and spans a spectrum of Jewish affiliation from ultra-Orthodox to Reform. The bar mitzvah boy's mom is not Jewish, and the next bar mitzvah boy in the family is being raised by two dads, one of whom is a convert to Judaism. I know that the residents of Martins Run, whose life perspectives were shaped by the fate of Jews in communities like Lipnik nad Becvou, were proud to be able to make the voice of a bar mitzvah boy be heard again on their behalf.

My next vacation will come in late October, after United Synagogue's Centennial Celebration. In that venue, hundreds of voices representing the diversity of Conservative Jewish experience will come together. Until then, I'm satisfied that even though I can't say I went away on vacation this summer, finding kehilla across the generations was much more memorable.

Learning Communities and Action Communities

More than 1,000 people belong to a community that they probably don't notice.

Here's what they have in common: They are members of Conservative kehillot (sacred communities). They are now synagogue leaders or someone thinks they should be someday. They want to know more about a specific topic, or are curious about what they might learn. They want to do something to change their synagogues or themselves. They want to feel that they're not alone.

From presidents to current leaders to emerging leaders, they share a commitment to learn, do and feel something new that will help them strengthen themselves as leaders and, in turn, their kehillot. They're using United Synagogue's new Sulam Leadership resources, developed in the last two years, and they form two distinct groups - a Learning Community and an Action Community.

Let me tell you about what's happening in each one.

Sulam Learning Community

In the last year, more than 600 people came to conferences and workshops in their shuls and in groups around the continent to learn about mission and vision, leadership succession, "sacred strategies" and goals, governance, and strategies for increased engagement. About 200 people regularly joined in on webinars about volunteer development, starting strategic planning, assessment, and financial sustainability. 55 new and incoming synagogue presidents went on retreat with our Sulam faculty. And more than 300 new leaders were identified, recruited and engaged in Sulam for Emerging Leaders.

We published some of the good things they had to say about Sulam for Current Leaders' resources, and Sulam for Emerging Leaders trainers and participants spoke publicly about what it did for them. But here's what else we know:

• Evaluations from more than 300 "current leader" program participants were overwhelmingly positive. More than 90% said they learned something new and would share what they learned. More than 75% said they'll be able to do something new because of what they learned. 
• An independent evaluation of Sulam for Emerging Leaders by Drs. Steven Cohen and Ezra Kopelowicz showed that our pilot cohort hit the mark in terms of identifying and engaging potential leaders in the 30-45 year old age range. A study of SEL's second year will be published shortly, and will include information about how participants moved from learners to do-ers. 
• Every Sulam session, workshop, retreat or webinar has some kind of activity that requires analysis, strategic thinking or decision-making. Kehilla leaders in our learning community did more than just learn: They created new mission statements or reviewed their current ones, set goals that relate to their missions, mapped the roles of clergy and lay leaders, created volunteer descriptions and profiles, compared their fundraising efforts to their development efforts, and assessed their readiness to change their membership models.

Sulam Action Community

41 congregations took action last year with the help of United Synagogue:

• 31 congregations launched Sulam for Emerging Leaders. This requires a significant training and preparation time commitment from their rabbi and a training partner who facilitate the program, and from the synagogue leaders to identify and recruit people who have the potential to come to the leadership table in the future. 
• 10 congregations are creating and implementing strategic plans through Sulam for Strategic Planners.

The Sulam Leadership Network

Synagogue leaders don't want to go it alone. For 21 years, the presidents who met each other at Sulam for Presidents stayed in touch and supported each other through their presidencies and beyond. Many friendships forged at Sulam continue 20 years later. Sulam for Presidents was United Synagogue's strongest synagogue leadership network. Now the network is expanding.

The hundreds of leaders in our Action Community meet face to face when they begin working with our Sulam team, and continue to interact on regular conference calls. The Sulam for Strategic Planners cohort will meet at our Centennial Celebration in October. Not only will they get the next level of training in strategic planning, but a number of sessions at the conference, particularly those on "The Communal Conversation" and "relational Judaism," will inform their strategies as they move from planning to action. Also at the Centennial, our Sulam for Presidents graduates will reunite in a special "Sulam Suite," and at VIP learning sessions.

Our Learning Community has networking opportunities as well. Our MetNY district regularly brings together synagogue presidents at the beginning of the year. Small congregations conferences in our Central and Northeast districts, and a conference for large congregations last year brought together leaders with similar interests and challenges. Our district, regional and special interest networked gatherings will continue in the coming year.

But here is my dream - that hundreds of our emerging leaders will meet each other, too, and we'll grow our Sulam Leadership Network beyond current leaders. The Centennial Celebration is the perfect venue to begin. Imagine if the leaders of tomorrow could find each other while they experience prayer and learning at its best. Their voices need to be heard at "The Conversation of the Century," and when the conference is over, their energy needs to be supported so that they can create the Conservative kehillot of the 21st Century together.

Contact me if you want to help make that happen.

Collaborations, Alliances and Mergers

I like data. I am easily distracted by practical articles with comparison data, like this one on housing prices, (sorry about the continued downturn, Europe). I can also get hooked on peculiar websites, like this one with the scariest data that I can't understand, or one that just makes me smile from knowing that, unlike the Twitter world, I am much happier today than I was in 2009.

I have another source that I regularly monitor - United Synagogue's client relationship management system (CRM). Our staff and volunteers record significant contacts and conversations in our CRM so that we can inform one another of issues, make assignments and track follow up. And some of this year's numbers caught my attention.

From July 2012 until June 2013, our kehilla relationship managers had 219 conversations with leaders from 75 synagogues about collaborations, alliances, and mergers.

I don't view data as telling the whole story, but as pointing to where I might find a story. So before trying to figure out the story, here's a closer look:

• 12 of the 75 synagogues have fewer than 100 member households.
• 8 of the 75 have more than 500 member households.
• Most of the congregations - 31 total - fall within the 200-500 member range.
• 20 of the congregations are in the corridor from New York to Baltimore.
• 15 of the congregations are in Florida.
• 14 of the congregations are in New England.
• 13 of the congregations are in California.
• Most of the conversations were about collaboration, sharing resources or merging components of the communities, like religious schools, not selling buildings or a larger congregation absorbing a smaller one.

I'm not surprised about where these conversations are happening. United Synagogue has high concentrations of its affiliated synagogues along the east coast, and reflects the generational history of Conservative Jews, creating communities in the early 20th Century in the northeast, and then in Florida in the mid to late 20th Century.

Before my friends who wish to point out that this also shows the decrease in numbers in the Conservative movement jump in, I'll say, "Point taken," and I'll ask that we move on. Collaboration and merger have the potential to change the dynamics, if not the demographics, of Conservative communities, particularly when mid-sized congregations combine forces.

Some of the most innovative collaboration and merger strategies are happening among mid-sized congregations in New England. For example, three synagogues in the Boston area - Mishkan Tefilla, Beth Emeth and Temple Reyim - are formally working towards creating a merged religious school with an innovative approach to formal and informal learning. Three other synagogues in the area were recently discussing creating one large community on the south shore. 

Not every merger story is about synagogues on the decline or one synagogue "absorbing" another. Florida has areas where large congregations of primarily older members are situated near small and growing congregations, made up of mostly young families. Discussions of alliance come from trying to create complementarity and continuity.

If I looked no further than the data I'm finding in our system, the numbers point towards the story that today's synagogue leaders are more open than ever to the idea of creating a strong community rather than clinging to their separate structures, and there are many potential collaborations and mergers on the immediate horizon. However, I'm not sure it will be that easy.

In the last month, the merger of the three synagogues in the Boston area changed course as Ahavath Torah in Stoughton, MA, pulled out of the talks. Another formal initiative in New Jersey between Beth Judah in Ventnor and Beth El in Margate stopped when the Beth El community voted against it.

In an eJewish Philanthropy article last week, Debra Brosan and Rabbi Hayim Herring describe their quick check on the landscape of collaboration and merger:

"The bottom line is that the leaders with whom we spoke saw the opportunity for greater synagogue collaboration and, in some cases, mergers, but were cautious about the prospect of congregational leaders taking a proactive stance."

Brosan and Herring discuss the hesitance:

"...synagogues resist collaboration even when it makes sense because they fear a loss of their own identity and a loss of members."

I believe that more than ever, this generation of leaders understands the benefits of working together towards creating strong, vibrant community. They are willing to discuss many options with our kehilla relationship managers, and sometimes begin a conversation with someone in the synagogue nearby. But as the details of the give and take of cooperation move from theoretical to real, synagogue leaders navigate complicated territory with no single "right" roadmap.

The majority of USCJ affiliated congregations - more than 65% - are in areas that do not have a local Federation bureau or program that supports synagogue strengthening and transformation. Until recently, United Synagogue had few resources to help congregations with mergers or collaboration. We began with sharing Tzemed Chemed, a helpful overview of the landscape written by Rabbi Paul Drazen, and often referred congregations to consultants, volunteers or other synagogue leaders who experienced it themselves. Our new resources, particularly on strategic planning, and our kehilla strengthening team approach are the beginning of our response to work with our affiliated kehillot more closely. We are gearing up for more services in this area over the next three years. I believe that with support, we will see more collaboration and alliances than ever, with the possibility of new communal structures that replace the traditional concept of merger.

The data in our system tells me that there is a new story ready to be written.

Finding Kehilla on the Road

I have written before about how much of my time is spent on retreat with people, and how quickly community can be created among strangers. I have just come back from two months of traveling and retreat-ing with groups from Boca Raton to Toronto. I've been in Baltimore, MD, Birmingham, AL, Atlanta, Harrisburg, PA, West Palm Beach, Jacksonville, FL, and Canada, meeting with people, leading a Sacred Strategies conference, and on retreat at Sulam for Presidents.

Here's what I found out.

1. Conservative Judaism has six generations under one roof. In addition to the usual five age-based demographics that we talk about - (Traditionalists, Baby Boomers, and Generations X, Y and Z) - we have another one that crosses almost all boundaries: the "Camp" generation. USY and Camp Ramah have created a shared experience that is as powerful as the cultural and political dynamics that molded people based on the time period in which they grew up. Camp created peak Jewish moments, connections, relationships and pure joy that former campers yearn to find in their congregations, but can't.

The retreat experience rekindles that spirit. Here's an example of a spontaneous eruption of celebration on Saturday night at Sulam for Presidents as we ended two long days of learning, prayer, reflection and bonding and realized we had to leave the next day.

2. Peak Jewish experiences don't just happen. Every group is different and a meaningful moment for one person or group might never be repeated with others.

Here is an example: Our closing ceremony for Sulam for Presidents has two simple components. Before we say tefillat ha derech, the prayer for travel, participants are asked to say how they have changed during the weekend. A tallit is passed from one president to the next, and when it's your turn to speak, you wear the tallit. The symbolism in the moment is that this tallit has been passed from president to president in every Sulam program for several years, and when it is on your shoulders, you are the next in a line of hundreds that have worn it before you. The tallit wraps one person, but no Sulam president is alone.

One year, our group included two women who had never worn a tallit before. Moving into the presidency of their synagogues was adding weight to their decision about whether or not they would begin this mitzvah. They realized during the tallit ceremony at Sulam that this was the moment when they would make that change in their practice and identity. They asked if they could pass the tallit to each other, and the group shehecheyanu was said with tears of supportive joy.

Knowing that we can't force inspiration, spirituality or meaning, we have only one rule at any of our retreats:

The "recipe" for every day must have three ingredients, the same that are the foundation of our kehillot: Learning, Worship and Community. 

3. Our new kehilla presidents don't need to be taught about Generation X. They are Gen X. Fourteen of the 40 presidents at our Sulam retreat were between the ages of 33 and 45, and their eyes are wide open. During a large group conversation about change that led to mentioning sisterhoods and men's clubs in synagogues, one 43-year old president said, "Women my age smoke cigars and men my age like to cook. How will our Sisterhood and Men's Club adjust to that?"

4. Collaboration, mergers, sharing space, and sharing staff are going to be considered signs of visioning and planning, rather than foretelling the doom of a community. From the growing community of young families in Congregation Shaarei Kodesh in West Palm Beach, using a small space as their base and renting a large space during High Holidays, to Beit Reyim Synagogue in Ontario that has moved into the Jewish Community Campus, leaders are looking at their vision of 21st Century community first, rather than how to sustain buildings from the 19th and 20th Centuries.

In the last two months, I didn't find much support for the tired narrative of the decline of the Conservative movement. Instead, I saw how Conservative Judaism, born 100 years ago in North America during a time of unprecedented change, gives us the framework for continually creating meaningful Jewish identity and experience. There are signs of fresh thinking, fearlessness and a commitment from a new generation of leaders whose shared experience will build the Jewish community of tomorrow.

Presenteeism

An article in the January/February issue of Harvard Business Review, The Third Wave of Virtual Work, by Lynda Gratton, outlines the three waves of change that technology created in patterns of workplace relationships and collaboration. The first wave began with easily accessible personal computers and email capability, and allowed entrepreneurs and free spirits to work from home. Mobile technology created the second wave, as corporate employees, enabled to work from anywhere and at anytime, moved out of the physical spaces that used to be required to house bulky and expensive equipment. According to Gratton, it is predicted that more than 1.3 billion people will be working remotely within a few years.

But working remotely can feel like working alone. The friendly familiarity, collaboration and water cooler connecting that used to be possible when people shared the same physical spaces aren't naturally occurring in our new virtual workplace environments.

The third wave, happening now, is a response to isolation. A new dynamic is emerging, creating "urban hubs"- physical spaces that remote workers can share. Urban hubs give remote workers a place to go, (instead of the local coffee shop), for well-designed workspaces, meeting areas and current technology. What's different about this than the old office building model? It's down the street from your home and you're not necessarily sharing space with people from your company.

It can be argued, and it has been, that productivity wasn't guaranteed when people were expected to show up to work in offices together. The term, "presenteeism," was coined at first to describe the phenomenon of people coming to work sick just to be counted as present. The word has expanded to mean the erroneous expectation that showing up for eight hours to an office space with your colleagues will guarantee that something meaningful will emerge.

Urban hubs offer a new take on the rationale for workers inhabiting a physical space. Rather than grouping people according to their corporate affiliation, a work space becomes the hub of activity based on shared interests and objectives. Gratton describes a membership-based Tech Shop in California that provides space for novice inventors, with shared tools and equipment, populated by local creative people supporting one another. She predicts outcomes from the more than 2,000 - and growing - co-working spaces around the globe:

When hubs serve particular communities, they tend to take on distinct cultures, which can translate into varying terms of use. They can also become hotbeds of talent where techniques, contacts and passions are shared, just as they were in the medieval guilds - and as they are today in massively multi-player online gaming guilds. Where visionaries have built these hubs, and people have come in search of productivity, fellowship and mentorship, we are beginning to see talent clusters emerge.

Companies whose remote workers find one another in urban hubs aren't threatened by the connections their workers make with people from other companies. Instead, the sparks created by fellowship and discovery fuel energy and initiatives.

Take out the HBR corporate language of productivity and what does this sound like? It is the ongoing conversation we're having in the Jewish community about how to re-imagine the use of our synagogue buildings.

We built physical spaces throughout the twentieth century with a "presenteeism" understanding of Jewish community. It went like this: If people just come into the building and are present for services, school and programs, something meaningful will emerge.

We have found that this logic has not held up. I hear it from synagogue leaders who ask, "What are the newest, most creative program ideas that get people in the door?" "What can we do to get young people to come to services?" "How do we make our services more interesting?"  They're watching the numbers in the sanctuary decrease and imagine that changes to what goes on in the sanctuary will bring those numbers back up.

The expectation of "presenteeism" misses the point. It is true that Judaism is best experienced and practiced in community, but defining our community and the quality of experience by how many people show up in the spaces we built is what we need to change.

This is more than merging two or three congregations into one building. We do need to accept the fact that more mergers are going to happen in the next ten years because of changing demographics. This also isn't about offering space in your current building to a chavurah or emerging kehilla.

This is about re-thinking hubs of activity and relationships. What are some examples in our kehillot?

• The leaders of three congregations in one community are exploring a vision of locating their joint religious school based on educational function, rather than choosing one synagogue location. This means looking at options that might place classes for the children in a site other than the synagogue buildings, and creating shared family experiences in all of the synagogues throughout the calendar year.
• The moving minyan: two or more kehillot collaborate and rotate minyan to various sites, rather than trying to get everyone to one synagogue building twice a day.
• Snowbird and Sunbird services: Rabbis and lay leaders travel in the winter to hold special Shabbat services for their members who spend the season in warmer cities. Or they co-sponsor summertime services in vacation areas with the synagogues in the resort areas. 
• Sharing the two-year communal adult education program, Context, sponsored by the Jewish Theological Seminary. Collaborative partners of Context become the hub for high level, intellectually rigorous study using local scholars and resources. The Conservative kehillot in Hartford, CT, Greater Washington, DC, Middlesex County, NJ, and many others in New York, Long Island, Brooklyn, and Queens are just the beginning.
• Congregational schools are beginning to use Shalom Learning, an online platform, for their learning curriculum and family engagement.
• The adult education program on Conservative Judaism at Beth Judah in Ventnor, NJ, connected speakers from the Conservative movement, including USCJ's CEO, Rabbi Steven Wernick, by webinar to their congregants who either watched at home or viewed the recording later.

The suggestions in the Harvard Business Review article about how companies can make changes also apply to our kehillot:

• Focus on collaboration. 
• Reconceive physical space.
• Tap remote talent.
• Invest in intuitive technology.
• Recognize idiosyncracy.

In a nutshell, where can we start? 

Move out of the mindset that only sees people in terms of membership and participation numbers. Both are tied to the bottom line of maintaining our buildings. Look, instead, at relationships and action. Is there a group you just wish would stop wanting their own services in their homes and come to Kabbalat Shabbat in your chapel? Is there a person who has all kinds of crazy ideas about adult education? Recognize their idiosyncracies and energy. Help them take one step towards their dreams. There might be others who want to join them. Don't get in the way.

Where can people collaborate? Where are points of energy in your community, regardless of location? What kinds of technology that people use at work (Webex, Go-to-Meeting) can bring resources to your community instead of trying to bring people or speakers to your building? 

No one expects anyone to sell off synagogue buildings in the next five years in favor of an online homeschooling chavurah-type Judaism. Let's recognize, though, that the presenteeism of the 20th Century doesn't work anymore, and the world is already giving us clues about where and how people want to naturally find each other in the future.

A Roomful of Conversation

If you were planning to host a party with the goal of having as many people as possible talk to each other about as many topics as possible, how would you design the seating? One long table or several small ones?

But think about it - why make them sit at all? What if there are no seats so people can mingle at will? Must it be inside, then? Whoa - stay with me - why can't you give them an outside trail to follow so they find each other on the path!

How would you plan the conversations? Let's go back to the idea of tables: Is there someone at the head of the table you'll assign to lead a discussion or will people naturally find the topics of mutual interest if you just give them the chance to sit near each other? If there will be leaders, how do you decide on the topics? Do you choose topics based on what the leaders would like to talk about? Or do you pick the broadest categories possible, have the leaders start the conversation, and trust that each person in the room will have some life experience to shape what follows?

How many conversations? How many choices? Won't it get overwhelming if there are too many? Will people not bother to come at all if there are too few?

These kinds of questions, and the exciting, (sometimes meandering), trails that creative thinking takes us on, have been the feverish focus behind the scenes at United Synagogue since late last summer as we embarked on planning our Centennial Celebration in October.

It's the Conversation of the Century. That's a whopper of a claim.

So how did we decide to approach this party with the goal of as many conversations as possible?

SEATING: We chose "All of the above." With an expectation of more than 1,000 people coming over a five day period that includes a Shabbaton, we're creating every possible combination of putting people together. There will be one "table," (ok, a huge auditorium), with one speaker to start the conversation, and choices to continue at other "tables," (aka conference rooms). We're setting aside spaces for reuniting with old friends, finding people who share your interest or your challenges, (Calling all synagogue presidents!). Want to walk around and mingle? A Centennial Square will help you find food, services, entertainment and your friends. There will be paths to follow through historic Jewish Baltimore, and service opportunities to leave behind something that will help others.

CONVERSATIONS: We chose eight big topics.

The Spiritual Conversation

The Global Conversation

The Personal Conversation

The Eternal Conversation

The Interfaith Conversation

The Israel Conversation

The Communal Conversation

The Future Conversation

Thought leaders, (some who will surprise you), will start the conversations.

Two examples: Clive Lawton, the founder of Limmud, will start the Global Conversation, based on his 20 years of experience spreading Jewish learning around the world. The Interfaith Conversation will get a start from Dr. Amy Jill Levine, Professor of New Testament and Jewish Studies at Vanderbilt University. Her insight into the similarities and differences between Christian and Jewish theology has drawn thousands to her speaking engagements.

A variety of other people will pick up the ball and continue the conversations in what we're calling "Follow the Conversation" workshops. You are invited to be one of those people. This is where we move from one table to many. But here is where we also want to diverge from just hosting a party with lots of conversations to convening a gathering where conversation leads to action.

Our Follow the Conversation workshops are expected to give people information, tools and resources where they can take next steps. Because what's the point of conversation if it doesn't help us to grow?

So come to the party. Stay for the conversation. Go home stronger than before.

See you there!

Life and Death

Did you know that there were no deaths of U.S. soldiers in Afghanistan last week?

I learned this on Friday night, before the recitation of the Mourners' Kaddish during Shabbat services at Beth El Temple in Harrisburg, PA. I didn't see it in newspapers, although this morning I found references from the Associated Press to January's casualties being the lowest monthly number since 2008, with an explanation that it is related to troop withdrawal. If PBS's News Hour reported it with their weekly list of the troops lost in the war, I missed it (because I was in shul).

I was powerfully struck by the announcement. Instantaneously, I had an image of how for one week, no parent of an American soldier got the dreaded knock on the door about their child losing his or her life. Regardless of the political or tactical reasons that would account for the number, at that moment when our prayer service instructs us to think of death, there was one place where I realized that death did not reach this week.

Our liturgy is filled with ways to not only help us pass through suffering, but also opportunities to regularly be thankful for peacefulness and wholeness. I view the morning prayer, Asher Yatzar, thanking God for the inner workings of our bodies, as well as prayers for healing and mourners kaddish, as brilliant reminders for us to notice the gift of each moment.

Rabbi Eric Cytryn has included the names of the soldiers who died that week during Beth El's Shabbat services since 2003, when he began his tenure. Rabbi Cytryn said that it's possible that some people thought that it was a political statement, but he always considered it the role of a religious community to create awareness of matters of life and death. That is the power that is possible in a religious community of practice. For me, it was a beautiful example of how our communal practice of prayer can help us connect with matters that transcend politics, and continually give us opportunities to reflect on the gift of life.

Living Room Learning as Relational Judaism

I spent the last six weeks deeply connecting and then retreating from community. First, I intensively trained several boards and leadership teams, then headed away for two weeks of relaxation.

I spent the final days of my vacation in northern Virginia, in a cable TV-free farmhouse overlooking the Shenandoah River and the majestic mountains blanketed in snow, with some of my family and a dog named Rufus.

It was in the mountains, separated from all community, that I thought about this well-known text from the Mishna quoting Hillel, (Avot 2:5):

הלל אומר אל תפרוש מן הצבור ואל תאמן בעצמך עד יום מותך ואל תדין את חברך עד שתגיע למקומו ואל תאמר דבר שאי אפשר לשמוע שסופו להשמע ואל תאמר לכשאפנה     אשנה שמא לא תפנה:

Hillel said: Do not withdraw from the community. And do not trust in yourself until the day of your death. And do not judge your fellow until you have put yourself in their place. Do not say something which cannot be heard (on the assumption) that eventually it will be heard. And do not say, 'When I have time I shall study,' perchance you will never have time.

[AJWS translation and Hebrew text from On1Foot]

I picture this as an illustration of the power of relationships to both empower us and challenge us.

For me, it is spatial. I envision concentric circles of communal involvement, with the most involved people at the center and least involved in the outside areas. The instruction from Hillel is this: Don't allow yourself to be drawn away from the gravitational pull of the community.

It's the quote that helps us argue in favor of synagogue affiliation, Jewish study, volunteering, and leadership.

But the reality is that affiliation and participation numbers among all religious groups in America are shrinking. One third of adults under age 30 identify themselves as having "no religion," and the number of unaffiliated adults rose from 15% to 20% in five years, according to a Pew Research Study released in October 2012. Leaders of our Conservative kehillot complain of decreasing participation in a myriad of programs, and are always on the lookout for new ideas that will bring people from the periphery into the synagogue buildings that are supposed to house the center of community. 

In a Synagogue 3000 report last year, Dr. Ron Wolfson gave this advice about how to approach decreasing engagement:

We have to move from a synagogue of programs targeting different populations to a deepening relationship between the synagogue and their members...The best way to root people in the life of the congregation is through relationships. If we don't people will drop their memberships, and that's a big problem.

What Wolfson and others have called, "relational Judaism," challenges leaders to stop imagining that the gravitational pull of programs will bring people towards the center, and, instead, cement bonds throughout the community based on sharing experiences and building relationships. Here are examples from some of our kehillot: 

• The vice president of a 300-member congregation in Pennsylvania began inviting two or three families per month to his home for Shabbat, with the goal of having Shabbat dinner, or at least making the invitation, to every person in his community by the time he finished his presidency.
• "Guess Who's Coming to Shabbas?" - the relationship-building initiative organized by Debbie Albert of Temple Sinai in Dresher, PA, with the goal of getting all 500 member families to host or be a guest at Shabbat dinner, has had almost half the congregation involved already. 
• The president of a 150-member congregation organized a "listening campaign," asking people to host "town halls" in homes so that she could hear what they cared about in their community. In six months, every member came to a town hall and met someone new in the process.
• "Living Room Learning," offered at Congregation Torat El in Oakhurst, NJ, where Rabbi Aaron Schonbrun creates a Jewish learning experience for any 10 people who organize a meeting in someone's home in the community.
• The Sulam for Emerging Leaders rabbis, trainers and participants in 30 kehillot - more than 250 people - are learning together right now, having Shabbat dinner and then opening up the circle of relationships to involve more people in the experience.

These examples put the possibility of engagement everywhere, not in the middle of concentric circles that increase towards the center. Relational Judaism reverses the imaginary spatial diagram of community.

Instead of warning people about moving away from the center, Hillel's injunction speaks directly to leaders who think they are at the center: Don't YOU separate yourself from the community. Remember that the community is not where you are, it is all around you. Your responsibility is to move throughout it. Create connections. Build relationships without an expectation of what will come next.

Through a series of conferences in the coming months, (March 11 and 17 in United Synagogue's Mid-Atlantic district and April 14 in our Northeast district),  we will be looking for examples of relational Judaism by highlighting visionary strategies of engagement and learning.

And it will be our Centennial Celebration, "The Conversation of the Century," in October 2013, that will be United Synagogue's movement-wide relationship building experience. Watch for online and in person conversations that are beginning now.